Let’s be honest here, putting ourselves out there in the world can be quite scary. This is true for both professional and social situations.
Everyone has insecurities, I have them, you have them. Much like everyone has fears. And a very common one is the fear of rejection, the uncertainty of putting yourself out there. Especially when it comes to meeting women…
This is because, unlike in a professional setting, when you get rejected when approaching a woman, it’s easy to feel like she’s rejecting who you are as a person.
But that’s not what’s actually going on, isn’t it? The rejection can mean a lot of things, many of which have absolutely nothing to do with you.
Don’t take it personally
Who knows? She might’ve just received news of the death of a loved one, she could’ve just broken up with a longtime boyfriend, or gotten fired from her job, and she’s not in a particularly receptive mood to be approached by anyone. Or, maybe she’s out with a friend she hasn’t seen for a very long time and looking to catch up and not get hit on by guys.
Going further, you might have fumbled the approach, said something uncalibrated or offensive to her, and she’s just not having it.
In any case, she’s rejecting your approach, not you as a person. And how could she? She doesn’t even know you to make an educated judgment of who you are. All she has is a small sample size that she got from your approach.
If your approach is the problem, and you’re getting blown out over and over. Good news! That’s something we can work on. Don’t feel down or be harsh on yourself, man. I used to feel that way, too. The secret is to focus on the things you can control, not feel sorry for the things that you can…
Even the top dating coaches in the world get rejected, man. There are just no infield videos for that. (Wouldn’t it be nice to see a rejection compilation? lol)
Learn from Your Experiences and Rejections
When I first started out, I didn’t have the resources you have today. What I do have is the mindset that everything is a learning experience. Especially the times that I do fail and get rejected…
I reverse-engineered these failed approaches and broke them down to see what went wrong. Once I got that down, I tested doing my approach differently the next time around. I did this over and over until I reached the point where I not only have awesome experience with beautiful women, but I also have the privilege of showing guys such as yourself how to do it in your own life.
So what seems to be rather painful rejections can give you unique, important insights you can build on for success later on. But that only comes about if you’re open to learning, if you see every experience as something you can learn from. Trust me, the payoff is awesome.
It’s HER LOSS
Especially if you’re actually working on being the best version of yourself, why would you stress about a couple of girls rejecting you? It’s not your fault that they don’t see the value you can offer (unless you’ve failed to communicate as much, in which case you do need to work on that.)
Having an abundance mindset is fundamental to having success with women (or success with anything in life, really). There are tons of beautiful women in the world, and getting upset just because a few said no to you is a very depressing way to go about it.
Think of approaching women like mining. You’re looking for the ones you find attractive, that’s going to appreciate what you bring to the table.
On a side tangent here. It is important that you know what it is that you bring to the table. Finding and staying on YOUR path is paramount. Knowing what you actually want in life and knowing what you want in the women in your life isn’t a “feel good” advice; it’s actually important for you to get it. After all, you can’t reach a goal if you don’t know what it is in the first place. Right?
NEVER Reject YOURSELF
You can get blown out by women over and over. Handle it like a man. (Of course, constant rejection might call for a different tactic, so maybe switch up your approach as well)
But the only true failure is if you reject yourself, if you let fear get the better of you, and if you let your excuses stop you from taking action. That’s what true failure really is– giving up on yourself before you even play the game.
Taking Action:
And here’s the key, my friend: you gotta take action, my friend. You can’t just sit on your ass and expect women to come flocking to you like moths to a flame. Hit the damn gym, revamp your wardrobe, and for the love of all that’s holy, learn how to groom yourself. It’s not rocket science, guys.
And go out and approach women. If you’re serious about leveling up your dating game, it’s time to take action. Invest in yourself. Looks do matter. So does your job, your choice of friends, your fashion sense, your hobbies, talents, and lifestyle. It all adds up to make you a complete package. Just because you don’t look like a movie star doesn’t mean you’re destined to settle for less in the dating world. By putting in the effort to enhance your appearance and develop your personality, you can elevate your attractiveness from a 4 to a 6, a 6 to a 7, and so on, finally reaching the legendary 10 level.
By taking action, meeting new women, learning to build social circles, having positive energy, and being the best you can be. You can easily have unlimited options in terms of dating and women.
Now, get off your ass and start meeting new women. If you need help, feel free to book a call with Kosmo and his coaches.