The age-old question: Do looks matter to women?
Alright, buckle up, kings, ’cause we’re about to dive into the raw, unfiltered truth about the age-old debate that’s been raging among men who start taking action about dating and transforming their dating life:
Do looks really matter when it comes to getting women?
Some of you think looks are the be-all and end-all, while others believe that if you’ve got the style, confidence, and game, looks don’t mean jack. Well, guess what? You’re both kinda right.
We’ve got two guys. Both are confident, independent, and have killer game and flirting skills. But there’s one major difference.
Guy A: This dude looks like a Greek god. Tall, ripped, and with a face that could make even the most stoic of women weak in the knees. Think Brad Pitt in his prime. He’s a solid 10 on the looks scale.
Guy B: Our second dude, not so lucky in the looks department. He’s under six feet, has a bit of a belly, is losing hair, and has a face only a mother could love. He’s about a 4, maybe a 5 if we’re feeling generous in terms of looks
Who do you think will do better with women, provided they both have the same skills in dating and relationships?
The answer is obvious to anyone with common sense.
Women’s Attraction:
Let’s break this down further using five attraction signals for women:
- Visual (looks, fashion, physique)
- Behavioral (confidence, vibe, dominance)
- Emotional (connection, comfort)
- Social Proof (status, friends, preselection)
- Value Expression (ambition, intelligence, humor, leadership)
Women are generally attracted to these channels simultaneously. A man who is very strong in behavioral and emotional expression (e.g., charming, funny, well-calibrated, confident) can outperform a “better-looking” man who lacks those traits.
That said, if you’re very attractive physically, the doors can open faster. But whether they stay open depends on everything else.
The Guy B can easily go from a 4-5 to 7-8 as long as he works out, dresses well, and styles himself properly. It’s not just the face. Bless your lucky stars for this. Unlike how men tend to have fairly consistent visual triggers (like body and facial symmetry, youth, hip-to-waist ratio, etc.), women’s attraction is way more emotional and connection-based.
So, do looks matter? Yes. But it’s not about being Brad Pitt. It’s about what your look communicates to women.
The Harsh Reality:
Let’s address the elephant in the room: looks matter.
Now, let’s not kid ourselves here, folks. Looks do matter. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either lying or delusional. A hot guy with the same confidence and game as an average-looking dude will always pull more. Women like guys who look good. They notice. They assess. They have preferences. They get turned on. They scroll Instagram too. Let’s not gaslight ourselves into thinking they’re immune to physical attraction.
If you, as Guy B, get his act together, drop some weight, fix his fashion style, and work on his grooming, his results will skyrocket. No question about it. Most men suck at marketing themselves. Once you fix the marketing part, you are solid. Women care about the complete package, not just your face.
BUT — and this is the nuance — what counts as “good looks” isn’t fixed.
But Wait, There’s More…
Now, saying looks are everything is equally ridiculous. I’ve seen all sorts of guys – chubby, balding, ugly, and skinny – getting laid with hot chicks because they had confidence and a killer game.
Confidence, independence, strong game, and relentless effort are key. You can be chubby, balding, and have a horrible fashion sense and still get girls. But if you can improve your grooming and fashion game and make the game easier, why wouldn’t you?
The Reality of Looks
Whether we like it or not, physical appearance is one of the first things women notice and consider when evaluating a potential partner. In fact it takes 5-7 seconds for someone to form an opinion about you based on how you look. If you’re struggling with weight, grooming issues, or any other aspect of your appearance, it can affect your success in attracting beautiful women. That part is true. BUT…
The “But” Syndrome:
Unlike men, who value on beauty quite highly on the importance scale when it comes to dating. Women don’t rate it that high. Most men would not date women they don’t find physically attractive. If the girl is not hot, most men would not even look at her.
Now, in the case of women, they tend to value the entire package you bring to the table more than just looks. Sure, they’ll notice if you resemble a Greek god, but they’re also interested in what’s lurking beneath the surface. Your personality, your wit, your charm – all that good stuff. Women care about how you make them feel and the emotions they get from you.
When a woman considers your value, looks are pretty high on the list. So if you are overweight, smelly, acne-prone, dress like a slob, poorly groomed, skinny, etc, you will struggle to attract beautiful women. The phrase “looks don’t matter” is a lie. Women do care about looks but they also care about the rest of you. The energy you bring, your passion, your skills in leadership, and other qualities in you as a man.
Most guys can level up here massively just by:
- Wearing clothes that fit
- Grooming properly
- Developing confidence
- Fixing body language and communication skills
If you want to make your life easier when it comes to dating women then:
- Your fashion sense matters
- Your hygiene matters
- Your grooming matters
- Your confidence matters
- Your witty humor and charm matter
- Your skills in bed matter
- Your ability to listen and connect with her matters
The Makeover Plan
If you look like a homeless guy, then you need to fix that shit ASAP. Looking your best should be priority number one. Hit the gym, clean up your diet, fix your grooming, and update your wardrobe. You’ll save time in the long run.
I did it. I didn’t take a full break, but over the past few years, I’ve overhauled my look. Dropped weight, gained muscle, fixed my hair, improved my fashion, and now, I look way better than I did in my college days.
Lucky for you. You are a guy. Guys can easily do a full body makeover just by going to the gym regularly, eating healthy, wearing the proper clothes that fit you, and taking care of your grooming. I was a solid 4 back then. Now, I’m at least an 8, maybe even pushing a 9 on a good day. The difference is night and day. Even girls will come and compliment me on how good I look. That never happened before, like ever in the past.
The Importance of Sexual Market Value:
In the game of dating, it’s essential to understand the concept of sexual market value (SMV). Your SMV encompasses not only your looks but also your job, lifestyle, social circle, and overall presentation. Improving your SMV involves working on all aspects of your life to increase your desirability to potential partners. It’s about the whole damn package – your job, your lifestyle, your social circle.
Women are constantly assessing what kind of emotional experience they’ll have with a guy. That’s why charisma can override looks. That’s why “funny is sexy.” That’s why self-amusement, teasing, storytelling, passion — all of it enhances perceived physical attraction. Looks matter less the more she learns about you, and if she likes what she learns, suddenly you look 10x better.
This is the effect of status, vibe, values, lifestyle, and emotional connection.
The higher your SMV, the more women you will attract towards you. When you are charming and confident, coupled with doing your best to look good by taking care of grooming, style, and other parts of your appearance. You really become the hottest 10 women desire.
Taking Action:
And here’s the key, my friend: you gotta take action, my friend. You can’t just sit on your ass and expect women to come flocking to you like moths to a flame. Hit the damn gym, revamp your wardrobe, and for the love of all that’s holy, learn how to groom yourself. It’s not rocket science, guys.
And go out and approach women. If you’re serious about leveling up your dating game, it’s time to take action. Invest in yourself. Looks do matter. So does your job, your choice of friends, your fashion sense, your hobbies, talents, and lifestyle. It all adds up to make you a complete package. Just because you don’t look like a movie star doesn’t mean you’re destined to settle for less in the dating world. By putting in the effort to enhance your appearance and develop your personality, you can elevate your attractiveness from a 4 to a 6, a 6 to a 7, and so on, finally reaching the legendary 10 level.
By taking action, meeting new women, learning to build social circles, having positive energy, and being the best you can be. You can easily have unlimited options in terms of dating and women.
Conclusion:
So, what’s the takeaway here? Looks matter. But they’re not the whole game. Confidence, game, and putting in the numbers are crucial, too. But if you want to make your life easier, get your looks in check. Work on yourself, improve your appearance, and watch how your results improve.
And remember, this ain’t just about getting laid. It’s about being the best version of yourself. So, get out there, put in the work, and take no prisoners.
Now, get off your ass and start making those changes. If you need help, feel free to book a call with Kosmo and his coaches.